She let him pull her in, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her cheek to his chest. “Oh, Loki. Look at us. Both so convinced we’re worthless people, so confused by others caring.” Closing her eyes, she kept projecting, pouring her sympathy and caring and desire for this wounded, struggling man out.
“Look at us both,” he repeated, nodding into her hair. ”Imagine what we could accomplish if we were without sentiment.”
It was something he had tried to achieve, but almost had to admit he could not. Yet here was a creature whose existence revolved around emotion. How tiring her life must be. He was exhausted already.
Summer thwacked his back lightly. “You’d be dead, because I wouldn’t have this power. I’ve known people who tried to cut off their emotions, and it didn’t end well for them.” Leaning back enough to look him in the face, she went on, “Loki … I can’t speak for you. But I told you once already, they tried to … mute me. And it was awful.”
“I can’t imagine how. Look how much pain this causes you. I see what you have to endure, just to be near someone. And you say it hurt to be without feeling?”
He shook his head and paced around the room. This woman was turning his brain to mush.
Her mouth twisted. “Imagine if someone took your magic from you.” Folding her arms, Summer regarded Loki. “That is how essential it is to me to feel. In this pain, I know I am alive.” She couldn’t help but frown, dark brows drawing together over green eyes. “Why is this so important to you? To push away emotion. Sentiment.”
“Not everyone,” Loki hissed, thinking of himself. He excused himself to wash for the day. ”Is there something else I can do for you, Summer? Before you are on your way today?”
Sudden anger shot through Summer. She flung herself out of the bed, heedless of her state of undress, and snatched at Loki’s hand, projecting love as hard as she could. Through gritted teeth, she said, “Everyone.”
Loki staggered back from her sudden touch, as an unfamiliar feeling pushed at him from all angles. He felt it surround and press against his skin, curling warmly between his fingers as they were clutched in Summer’s. The feeling pricked at his eyes and climbed up his throat. It was unbearably beautiful.
“Ahh, what…” he breathed, but then could only close his eyes and pull her closer.
She let him pull her in, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her cheek to his chest. “Oh, Loki. Look at us. Both so convinced we’re worthless people, so confused by others caring.” Closing her eyes, she kept projecting, pouring her sympathy and caring and desire for this wounded, struggling man out.
“Look at us both,” he repeated, nodding into her hair. ”Imagine what we could accomplish if we were without sentiment.”
It was something he had tried to achieve, but almost had to admit he could not. Yet here was a creature whose existence revolved around emotion. How tiring her life must be. He was exhausted already.
Summer thwacked his back lightly. “You’d be dead, because I wouldn’t have this power. I’ve known people who tried to cut off their emotions, and it didn’t end well for them.” Leaning back enough to look him in the face, she went on, “Loki … I can’t speak for you. But I told you once already, they tried to … mute me. And it was awful.”
He sighed heavily. ”Done nothing more than care, I suppose.” He stood, looking out into the glow of morning.
“I wonder if anyone will mourn his death,” he mumbled under his breath. He wondered briefly about all the deaths that went unnoticed, every day. And then there were those that were celebrated.
Softly, Summer said, “I do.” She looked at her hands, lying on the covers. “I can deal death, but it doesn’t mean I like it, and it’s sad that there was no way to save him from himself.” She paused, blinking rapidly. “Everyone should be loved.”
Except me, she couldn’t stop herself thinking.
“Not everyone,” Loki hissed, thinking of himself. He excused himself to wash for the day. ”Is there something else I can do for you, Summer? Before you are on your way today?”
Sudden anger shot through Summer. She flung herself out of the bed, heedless of her state of undress, and snatched at Loki’s hand, projecting love as hard as she could. Through gritted teeth, she said, “Everyone.”
Loki staggered back from her sudden touch, as an unfamiliar feeling pushed at him from all angles. He felt it surround and press against his skin, curling warmly between his fingers as they were clutched in Summer’s. The feeling pricked at his eyes and climbed up his throat. It was unbearably beautiful.
“Ahh, what…” he breathed, but then could only close his eyes and pull her closer.
She let him pull her in, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her cheek to his chest. “Oh, Loki. Look at us. Both so convinced we’re worthless people, so confused by others caring.” Closing her eyes, she kept projecting, pouring her sympathy and caring and desire for this wounded, struggling man out.
She had to close her eyes against the pain of his words briefly. Sent away. Unwanted.
She should have listened to the dream.
Summoning up a smile, she squeezed his hand. “I know I said that, but truly, you don’t owe me anything. I was glad to help, even a little bit.”
“What is the matter?” He asked, seeing her expression drop, looking hurt. ”Believe me, I will be at your call, for anything you need. You deserve that and more. I should not have involved you at all, but Thanos threatened you and it just made me so furious that he would involved an innocent third party who had—” something in the way she looked at him cut him off.
“For the last time, Loki, you didn’t ‘involve’ me. I chose.” Summer’s lips crimped together for a moment. She pulled her hand back and folded her arms, tossing hair out of her face. “Now, ‘an innocent third party who had’ what?”
He sighed heavily. ”Done nothing more than care, I suppose.” He stood, looking out into the glow of morning.
“I wonder if anyone will mourn his death,” he mumbled under his breath. He wondered briefly about all the deaths that went unnoticed, every day. And then there were those that were celebrated.
Softly, Summer said, “I do.” She looked at her hands, lying on the covers. “I can deal death, but it doesn’t mean I like it, and it’s sad that there was no way to save him from himself.” She paused, blinking rapidly. “Everyone should be loved.”
Except me, she couldn’t stop herself thinking.
“Not everyone,” Loki hissed, thinking of himself. He excused himself to wash for the day. ”Is there something else I can do for you, Summer? Before you are on your way today?”
Sudden anger shot through Summer. She flung herself out of the bed, heedless of her state of undress, and snatched at Loki’s hand, projecting love as hard as she could. Through gritted teeth, she said, “Everyone.”
“Are you?” he asked seriously. He felt it would be prying to ask what the dream was about, as much as his curiosity was piqued. Another time, perhaps.
“Last night was…straining on us both, no doubt.” He blinked and toyed with his fingers thoughtfully. ”Still…Thanos is dead. And you fought brilliantly.”
“Eh.” She shrugged. “Fire is easy to fight with, you just throw it around. I just … wanted you to … I don’t know. I know he hurt you, but you were so glad to hurt him back. And I was in his mind. So you were … kind of hurting me too.” Summer reached out and put her hand on Loki’s, stilling his restless fingers. “But I’m glad I could help.”
He made a face. ”A bit self destructive? You should not keep my company, Summer. You should be on your way. Is there something I can do for you, to even my debt?”
She had to close her eyes against the pain of his words briefly. Sent away. Unwanted.
She should have listened to the dream.
Summoning up a smile, she squeezed his hand. “I know I said that, but truly, you don’t owe me anything. I was glad to help, even a little bit.”
“What is the matter?” He asked, seeing her expression drop, looking hurt. ”Believe me, I will be at your call, for anything you need. You deserve that and more. I should not have involved you at all, but Thanos threatened you and it just made me so furious that he would involved an innocent third party who had—” something in the way she looked at him cut him off.
“For the last time, Loki, you didn’t ‘involve’ me. I chose.” Summer’s lips crimped together for a moment. She pulled her hand back and folded her arms, tossing hair out of her face. “Now, ‘an innocent third party who had’ what?”
He sighed heavily. ”Done nothing more than care, I suppose.” He stood, looking out into the glow of morning.
“I wonder if anyone will mourn his death,” he mumbled under his breath. He wondered briefly about all the deaths that went unnoticed, every day. And then there were those that were celebrated.
Softly, Summer said, “I do.” She looked at her hands, lying on the covers. “I can deal death, but it doesn’t mean I like it, and it’s sad that there was no way to save him from himself.” She paused, blinking rapidly. “Everyone should be loved.”
“Are you?” he asked seriously. He felt it would be prying to ask what the dream was about, as much as his curiosity was piqued. Another time, perhaps.
“Last night was…straining on us both, no doubt.” He blinked and toyed with his fingers thoughtfully. ”Still…Thanos is dead. And you fought brilliantly.”
“Eh.” She shrugged. “Fire is easy to fight with, you just throw it around. I just … wanted you to … I don’t know. I know he hurt you, but you were so glad to hurt him back. And I was in his mind. So you were … kind of hurting me too.” Summer reached out and put her hand on Loki’s, stilling his restless fingers. “But I’m glad I could help.”
He made a face. ”A bit self destructive? You should not keep my company, Summer. You should be on your way. Is there something I can do for you, to even my debt?”
She had to close her eyes against the pain of his words briefly. Sent away. Unwanted.
She should have listened to the dream.
Summoning up a smile, she squeezed his hand. “I know I said that, but truly, you don’t owe me anything. I was glad to help, even a little bit.”
“What is the matter?” He asked, seeing her expression drop, looking hurt. ”Believe me, I will be at your call, for anything you need. You deserve that and more. I should not have involved you at all, but Thanos threatened you and it just made me so furious that he would involved an innocent third party who had—” something in the way she looked at him cut him off.
“For the last time, Loki, you didn’t ‘involve’ me. I chose.” Summer’s lips crimped together for a moment. She pulled her hand back and folded her arms, tossing hair out of her face. “Now, ‘an innocent third party who had’ what?”
Loki twitched around the corner, watching. He felt his hands clench and unclench, legs drift forward a few hesitant steps. It is not my concern. I don’t care. I shouldn’t care…
Then he found himself sitting beside her, taking each of her hands in his and gently wrapping his fingers around hers. ”Summer. Summer, wake up. You are dreaming,” he spoke quickly. He was entirely unsure how to comfort someone.
Hands grasping her hands startled Summer out of the dream with a little shriek. “Oh god, oh god,” she panted, eyes wide and blurred with panic. She clutched at Loki’s hands, staring around, breathing slowing down gradually. “I hate that dream … “
“One you have often?” he asked softly, letting go of her hands and moving back slightly, nervously.
Pushing herself out of the pillows, she pressed a hand to her heart. “More often than I care to think about, honestly.” She smeared a hand over her eyes, wiping away tears. “It’s been a while, though.” Giving a small sigh, Summer sat up entirely, folding her legs under the covers, and regarded Loki. “Well, I’m all better now.”
“Are you?” he asked seriously. He felt it would be prying to ask what the dream was about, as much as his curiosity was piqued. Another time, perhaps.
“Last night was…straining on us both, no doubt.” He blinked and toyed with his fingers thoughtfully. ”Still…Thanos is dead. And you fought brilliantly.”
“Eh.” She shrugged. “Fire is easy to fight with, you just throw it around. I just … wanted you to … I don’t know. I know he hurt you, but you were so glad to hurt him back. And I was in his mind. So you were … kind of hurting me too.” Summer reached out and put her hand on Loki’s, stilling his restless fingers. “But I’m glad I could help.”
He made a face. ”A bit self destructive? You should not keep my company, Summer. You should be on your way. Is there something I can do for you, to even my debt?”
She had to close her eyes against the pain of his words briefly. Sent away. Unwanted.
She should have listened to the dream.
Summoning up a smile, she squeezed his hand. “I know I said that, but truly, you don’t owe me anything. I was glad to help, even a little bit.”
Loki twitched around the corner, watching. He felt his hands clench and unclench, legs drift forward a few hesitant steps. It is not my concern. I don’t care. I shouldn’t care…
Then he found himself sitting beside her, taking each of her hands in his and gently wrapping his fingers around hers. ”Summer. Summer, wake up. You are dreaming,” he spoke quickly. He was entirely unsure how to comfort someone.
Hands grasping her hands startled Summer out of the dream with a little shriek. “Oh god, oh god,” she panted, eyes wide and blurred with panic. She clutched at Loki’s hands, staring around, breathing slowing down gradually. “I hate that dream … “
“One you have often?” he asked softly, letting go of her hands and moving back slightly, nervously.
Pushing herself out of the pillows, she pressed a hand to her heart. “More often than I care to think about, honestly.” She smeared a hand over her eyes, wiping away tears. “It’s been a while, though.” Giving a small sigh, Summer sat up entirely, folding her legs under the covers, and regarded Loki. “Well, I’m all better now.”
“Are you?” he asked seriously. He felt it would be prying to ask what the dream was about, as much as his curiosity was piqued. Another time, perhaps.
“Last night was…straining on us both, no doubt.” He blinked and toyed with his fingers thoughtfully. ”Still…Thanos is dead. And you fought brilliantly.”
“Eh.” She shrugged. “Fire is easy to fight with, you just throw it around. I just … wanted you to … I don’t know. I know he hurt you, but you were so glad to hurt him back. And I was in his mind. So you were … kind of hurting me too.” Summer reached out and put her hand on Loki’s, stilling his restless fingers. “But I’m glad I could help.”
Loki could not help a slight pang of disappointment when he woke up alone in his bed. Then again, when he was honest with himself, it had never been any other way. He had used and been used, but when the light of day exposed him, he only had himself.
Rising to look out the window, he stole a glance around the dividing wall to where Summer lay, sunk in among the pillows, mostly covered by her hair. He leaned his head gently against the wall and listened to her breathing in and out, very quietly, gently. That eased his conscience a bit, after what he had put her through, and he was selfish enough to want to ease it.
A strangled wail emerged from the heap of pillows, and Summer flung one hand out across the width of the bed. “Don’t … ” she cried, muffled, then squirmed deeper under the covers, breathing turned harsh.
Loki twitched around the corner, watching. He felt his hands clench and unclench, legs drift forward a few hesitant steps. It is not my concern. I don’t care. I shouldn’t care…
Then he found himself sitting beside her, taking each of her hands in his and gently wrapping his fingers around hers. ”Summer. Summer, wake up. You are dreaming,” he spoke quickly. He was entirely unsure how to comfort someone.
Hands grasping her hands startled Summer out of the dream with a little shriek. “Oh god, oh god,” she panted, eyes wide and blurred with panic. She clutched at Loki’s hands, staring around, breathing slowing down gradually. “I hate that dream … “
“One you have often?” he asked softly, letting go of her hands and moving back slightly, nervously.
Pushing herself out of the pillows, she pressed a hand to her heart. “More often than I care to think about, honestly.” She smeared a hand over her eyes, wiping away tears. “It’s been a while, though.” Giving a small sigh, Summer sat up entirely, folding her legs under the covers, and regarded Loki. “Well, I’m all better now.”