Our characters are fully aware they’re fictional characters. They often refer to the muns as gods. Sometimes random spontaneous crossovers happen and the characters just chalk it up to a glitch in the world. At this point, the fourth wall has not only been shattered, but ground to dust and stomped into the ground.
The ripple of his internal laughter was good. She was starting to think he didn’t actually have a sense of humour. Commentary about her height didn’t count.
“Big things come in small packages, Mr Stark. Go on, you can laugh at me. I know what I look like when that happens.” She cocked her head to one side. “I could definitely keep up with you. But then again,” she shrugged, “I cheat.”
Casually she pulled the braid over one shoulder, where it hung nearly to her knees. “Do you need a bodyguard?”
He was trying really hard not to laugh, but she was making it difficult.
“Look, I haven’t needed a bodyguard for three months. If you can convince me I need one, then maybe I’ll hire you. Maybe. I might even throw in room and board. IF you can convince me.”
“You are gonna rupture something if you keep refusing to laugh,” she commented. “Tell me, do you not need a bodyguard because you can defend yourself, or because they never even get to you? I’ve got other skills, if you’d rather. Though if I’m showing off, I really would prefer not to just out in the open.” She circled a hand around to indicate the area around him. “It tends to startle people.”
iamthefirechild replied to your post: iamthefirechild replied to your post: ✿ Glumly,…
“No! No. I don’t want to be a bother, and, and — ” She sighs. “And practically everything I’ve said to you this whole time has been a come-on. And it’s really rude and pushy and wrong.”
“But, here’s the thing—if I truly was scared by it, thought it was obsessive, borderline creep-like, I would have said something, not gone with it. Just tossing that out there for you.”
“This is not how I usually make friends with people, far less people I admire.”
She looked down, tapping the chopsticks on the edge of the box. “Victor … do vampires burn? Is that a true part of the mythology?”
“Yeah, they do…they definitely got that part of the mythology right. Although, it doesn’t really affect me the same way. It’s normally used to finish off vampires to ensure they don’t survive, but I learned kind of the hard way that it doesn’t really…y’know, turn me into a pile of dust.”
Her voice was very quiet, almost empty. “All you have to do is get me within sight range of him. He’ll die.” Summer laid the chopsticks down, got up, and stepped away, rubbing her arms as if she was cold.
“People-watching. Making fun of you. Why?”
Oh, this was fun. He was supposed to be the most witty, smooth man in the world, and it was so /easy/ to make fun of him.
She rolled over, tried to get up, planted one hand on the end of her long braid, and sat down hard. “Ow. Swear words.” The second attempt went better, and she stuck her hands in her pockets as she sauntered over to him.
He was a long way up to look. At least eight inches taller than she was. Maybe more like a foot. She rocked onto her toes, slightly, smirking.
“You waited here all morning just so that you could pick on me? I’m flattered.”
He watched as the woman attempted to sit up and…
No. No, he was not going to laugh, because that would be rude. He would, however, chuckle about it later should he remember.
Which he might. He tended to remember stuff like this for reasons he wasn’t entirely sure of.
“… you… weren’t offering to be my bodyguard just now, were you? Because not only could you probably not keep up with me, but you’re kind of tiny.”
The ripple of his internal laughter was good. She was starting to think he didn’t actually have a sense of humour. Commentary about her height didn’t count.
“Big things come in small packages, Mr Stark. Go on, you can laugh at me. I know what I look like when that happens.” She cocked her head to one side. “I could definitely keep up with you. But then again,” she shrugged, “I cheat.”
Casually she pulled the braid over one shoulder, where it hung nearly to her knees. “Do you need a bodyguard?”
She waggled her eyebrows at him. “Okay, okay. What’s the plan for tomorrow?” Keeping one eye on him, she ate some more.
He smirked then took another bite of his food. “Well, odds are we’ll have to get him while he’s hunting, which’ll unfortunately be at night when he and coincidentally, myself, will be strongest. If he’s hunting, he’ll be focused on the hunt and not on being hunted, y’know? So, I’m thinking we spend the day tracking where he’s been in the surrounding area?”
Summer shrugged. “I might be able to get a line on his mind and track him that way. I’m not sure it’s a good idea to hit him at night, though. Wouldn’t it be easier just to find his home?”
“We could, it won’t be the usual sort of home since he’s not planning on staying here permanently, but there will be something of a nest of sorts. That’s a good idea, and that way we won’t have to go during the night when he’d be strongest.”
She looked down, tapping the chopsticks on the edge of the box. “Victor … do vampires burn? Is that a true part of the mythology?”
“So I’ve heard.” He takes the gift, his eyes immediately staring at the wrapping paper. “How do you even find this stuff? I’ve clearly been looking in the wrong areas. Should I open it now or wait until next year?”
“You should open it now. I made it, actually. Well, okay, I bought the box — it’s for keeping things in — but I made the paper — ” She shut up. Babbling. Bad. Don’t babble. She put her hands behind her back, yanking on the end of her braid before pulling it over one shoulder.
“Did you just ruin the surprise for me? By telling me it was a box? Or is there something in the box that’s the actual gift and not the box? The paper is very nice by the way.” In fact, he even tried to unwrap the gift without ripping the paper in any way. Hey, it was nice paper—he was going to keep it, what with the Iron Man print all over it.
“Nono, there’s stuff /in/ the box.” There was a lot, actually. A couple of books she hoped he’d like, a couple of bracelets she’d made with the Iron Man helmet and the arc reactor in beadwork, some cat toys and a little, carefully labelled, packet of catnip, because she heard he liked cats. “But the box is for keeping, too.”
She whacked him on the knuckles with the chopsticks. “I said thank you, that kinda means I like it.” She put a piece of chicken in her mouth and made the “too hot” face, eyes watering. Opening her mouth wide, she fanned, sucking air in through the sides. When she finally recovered, she wiped at her eyes and asked, “Did you get anything for yourself?”
Victor gave her a look of mock hurt before smiling. “I’m glad you like it, darling.” His eyes grew wide at her reaction to the food, scared for a moment that she might be choking but relieved when she recovered. “You all right? An’ what do you mean? T’ wear? Uh, no, I didn’t…I figured I’d be alright in my boxer briefs. I was more thinkin’ of you being comfortable.”
She waggled her eyebrows at him. “Okay, okay. What’s the plan for tomorrow?” Keeping one eye on him, she ate some more.
He smirked then took another bite of his food. “Well, odds are we’ll have to get him while he’s hunting, which’ll unfortunately be at night when he and coincidentally, myself, will be strongest. If he’s hunting, he’ll be focused on the hunt and not on being hunted, y’know? So, I’m thinking we spend the day tracking where he’s been in the surrounding area?”
Summer shrugged. “I might be able to get a line on his mind and track him that way. I’m not sure it’s a good idea to hit him at night, though. Wouldn’t it be easier just to find his home?”
