“However, I still hold it as a point of pride that I was part of a two-person team that made him run (not quite screaming) from the table.” you need to tel this story RIGHTNOW. Did you sing the Hedgehog Song?

suricattus:

*shamefaced*  I did.  There may have been interpretive dance involved, too. Over a bbq lunch at some convention or another many years ago….  (and everyone at the table was sober).  

Since the other person involved is not much on social media, I will not shame-tag, save to say it was another writer, of older years and advanced silliness, so I was led astray by my elders….

I /know/ you, and I am quite sure there was no leading. You went along willingly.